July 17.

            "He sure is," said Kid Icarus.  "That is almost an understatement."

            "In my opinion, it is an understatement!" said Roy.

            "Hello, Roy Koopa!" said Luigi.  "What are you up to?"

            "Oh, just havin' some harmless fun, Luigi.  Joking with ol' Agahnim.  Hey, Kevin, look who's back here."

            Kevin was a little farther ahead in the line.  "Who, Roy?  Hey, aren't you the Mario Brothers?"  He went back to the Mario Brothers.

            "Yeah, pal," Mario said.  "You must be Captain N, the Game Master."

            "Yes, though my friends refer to me by my given name, Kevin," said Captain N.  "Who are the Mushroomian and the dinosaur?"

            "My name is Toad.  In the Super Mario Brothers' first adventure, I was captured seven times and held at the end of the castles at the end of lands one through seven, right after Bowser Koopa's fake.  In their second adventure, I helped them sock it to Wart.  In their third and greatest, I provided items to Mario and Luigi in their search through the vastness of the Mushroom World.  I had no role in their adventure in Dinosaur Land."

            Yoshi said, "That where Yoshi come in.  I Yoshi.  Bowser and Koopalings captured my Yoshi-cousins, so Yoshi followed from home on Yoshi Island.  Soon as Yoshi had set off to rescue cousins, Iggy trapped me in an egg.  Super plumbers saved Yoshi from egg, after which Yoshi helped them through most of Dino Land except spooky places, like Ghost Mansions, Fortresses, and Castles."

            "Ah, yes.  I've just played Super Mario Brothers 3 and Super Mario World," said Kevin.  "Seems as though you've had some hairy adventures."

            Luigi said, "Quite hairy.  Let's hear about some of your adventures, Kevin."

            "In the beginning, I was playing the video game Punchout!! and my dog, Duke, was with me.  Suddenly, I was pulled into my TV set, and Duke followed me.  The Ultimate Warp Zone had taken me from my home to VideoLand.  Since then, we've had some pretty crazy adventures in which we have had to subdue MotherBrain."

            "So," said Mario, "Duke has been dogging you ever since, huh?"

            " 'Dogging'?  Not bad, Mario!  Where is Princess T.?"

            "She's over there talking to the other two princesses.  How are you doing, Kevin?"

            "I'm doing fine.  How about you?"

            "We're well.  We just got out of Koopa's Neon Castle, which was a really crazy place."

            Luigi said, "Yeah.  Now, Neon Castle's in Yoshi's stomach!"

            "Oh?  I didn't think Neon Castle was such a small place," said Kevin.

            "It's probably as large as Metroid."

            "Oh.  Well, anyway, I should like you to meet another couple of my friends, MegaMan and Rush."

            MegaMan came up and said, "Hi, Mario Brothers!"

            "Hi, MegaMan!" said Mario.  "Where's Rush?"

            "Right here beside me.  Say hi, Rush."  Rush the RoboDog emitted a bark.

            "Ah!  Rush is the robotic pooch," Luigi said.

            "Exactly!  He has mega-helped me through all kinds of disasters in MegaLand, the republic spanning four solar systems that, a few millennia ago, brought the peoples of VideoLand together in peace and forged the mega-enormous alliance that became the kingdom that exists today."

            Link came up.  �Hallo!  {Hahl-ló!}  [German]  (Hello!)"  "I hope that I am interrupting nothing."

            "No, sure not, Link," said Kevin.

            Mario said, "You must be Link."

            "Yes, and you must be the Mario Brothers," Link said.

            "That we are," said Luigi.

            "It should appear that the three princesses are bumping gums with one another," Link commented.  "Princess Zelda, Princess Lana, Princess Peach, and Kid Icarus knew one another before the kings had to close the warp zone between the Palace of Power and the Mushroom World.  For a long time, Kid Icarus has been the head of the Mount Icarus Army and Queen Palutena's second-in-command."

            "Link is correct," Kid Icarus said.

            "I wonder what those princesses are talking about," said Toad.

            * * *

            "It's good to see you two again," Peach said.

            Lana concurred, "It's great to see you again, too, Peach.  How's your kingdom?"

            "It would be a paradise without those stinky Koopas."

            "Yes," Zelda said.  "This land, too, would be a paradise without MotherBrain, Agahnim, and their minions."

            "How true," said Lana.

            "Hang on a sec," Zelda said.  "MotherBrain is up there on the stage."

            The brain announced, "And now, our guests, we are preparing the entertainment for you.  May it please you!"  Directly after she had said that, the audio speakers repeated the message in French, Spanish, Portuguese, Italian, and German.

            Lana said, "It's 14.00.  MotherBrain hasn't tried anything rotten yet."  Kid Icarus came.

            "Hello, princess-ici," said Kid Icarus.  "Good to see you again, Princess P.T."

            "Same here," said Princess Peach.

            "I spoke with your four associates.  Two pasta-loving Koopa-smashing plumbers, an eat-up-anything dinosaur, and a Mushroomian retainer."

            "Correct."

            Zelda looked over at the 'snack-line.'  "It should appear that they all have met."

            "Who is serving the punch?" Peach asked.

            "Guess who.  It's King Hippo."

            "That idiot?" Lana asked.  "MB sure has dumb stooges."

            Kid Icarus looked at the schedule.  "Hm.  The schedule says that it's about time for the entertainment - as MotherBrain just said - and King Hippo, Eggplant Wizard, Dr. Wily, and Mouser are entertaining.  I'll get above things and see who the replacements are."  He did so, then returned.  "It appears that King Hippo's replacement is Roy Koopa.  Eggplant Wizard had been helping with the refreshments, but it seems that he has been replaced by Ludwig von Koopa."

            Peach said, "Ludwig 'Kooky' von Koopa.  He's the worst of the Koopalings.  He is extremely inventive.  He tricked his way into University of VideoLand at Funga through false records."

            "VideoLand's most prestigious university," Lana said.  "I'm pleasantly surprised that it hasn't been renamed.  What was his course record?"

            "Lana, that person took a course load of approximately thirty credit hours per semester.  He took three semesters every one of his six years there.  He passed every subject with no less than three point five.  His work in chemistry, physics, and mathematics is unsurpassed in all of VideoLand."

            "Good gracious," said Lana.

            "He discovered how to resist the gravitational pull of a black hole.  He used advanced calculus to prove the existence of a new set of numbers beyond the complex.  I tried to study calculus in college, remember, and I barely passed.  Those differentiation rules and limits got me."

            "I'm going to have to find out more about that," said Zelda.

            "Without you, Zelda, I would never have gotten through college math," Lana said.  "That integration. . . ugh!  It would have killed me if I had gone to the optional Calculus 302.  And to think how well I'd done in Limits 204.  I don't have the head for calculus.  Of course, Kevin takes to almost anything like a sparrow takes to the sky."

            "Even affection?" Peach asked.

            "Oh, especially that.  Don't any of you dare tell him I think that, though, before I tell him.  And that includes you, Kid Icarus."

            "Of course, Princess-icus," Kid Icarus said.

            "The rest of the N-Team and I met with Ludwig and King Bowser earlier," Lana said.  "Ludwig helped get Simon untied; the twit was all wrapped up by his whip."

            "I believe that the only intellectual difference between Simon Belmont and a stone is three intelligence quotient points," said Zelda.  "Guess who I think has more IQ points."

            Lana asked, "Who?"

            "The stone!" laughed Zelda.

            "Ha, ha!" Peach laughed.  "Now that is a stupid person, Zelda!"

            Larry came onto the stage.  "All right, everybody!  I think this will last long enough.  Now, the entertainment is ready.  I present to you the crazy, the stupid, and the idiotic three stooges and the wicked scientist!  They are King Hippo, Eggplant Wizard, Doctor Wily, and Mouser."  He left the stage, and the four that he had just mentioned appeared on the stage and began their stunts.  Wily was never on the receiving end of any punch-line.

            Just as the entertainment began, the princesses arrived at the punch table, where Roy greeted, "Hello, ladies!  Allow Roy Koopa to pour your punch.  Here's yours, Princess Zelda; yours, Princess Peach; and yours, Princess Lana.  Enjoy."

            Simon, Yoshi, Toad, Mario, Luigi, Captain N, Link, and MegaMan arrived at the refreshments table at about the same time as the entertainment started.  "Hello, everyone.  Prince Ludwig von Koopa at your service.  Please notice that Dr. Wily is never the victim of the tricks.  That is no distortion of what actually happens; he and Ridley are MotherBrain's smartest, most underhanded employees.  However, we could not allow Ridley up on stage, lest he destroy something important.

            "Now, then, what would you like, Simon?"

            "I'll take some of everything, if you don't mind," said Simon.

            "All right."  To Kevin, Ludwig whispered, "At least he can talk, Captain N!"  Kevin smiled as Ludwig took a clean plate and used clean utensils to place a little bit of everything upon Simon's plate carefully.  "Here, Simon.  I believe that you'll enjoy all of it.  Hello, Yoshi."

            "I'd like a lot of everything," Yoshi said.

            Ludwig sighed.  "Very well, Yoshi."  In the same manner, Ludwig placed a lot - but not too much - of everything on Yoshi's plate.  "Voilà.  What about you, Toad?"

            "I'll take some chicken and nuts, if you don't mind," Toad said.

            "All right, Toad."  Ludwig took a clean plate for Toad and put some chicken and nuts on the plate with clean utensils.  "Here.  Enjoy.  Luigi, what would you like?"

            "I'll take a few of those great-looking pizza wedges," Luigi said.

            "All right.  Here you are.  Enjoy.  And you, Mario?"

            "I'll have the same," said Mario.

            "So I figured.  Here you are.  What about you, Captain N?"

            Captain N said, "Oh, some of everything."

            "Fine.  There you are.  And you, MegaMan?"

            "I think I'll have some nuts," MegaMan said.

            "Okay.  Here you are.  What would you like, Link?"

            "I'll have a little bit of everything, if you please," said Link.

            "Good."  He fixed Link's plate.  "Here you go, Link."  Everyone sat down at a table.  There, everyone introduced themselves.

            "Mmm!" said Mario.  "These pizza wedges are yummy!"

            * * *

            On the stage, Eggplant said, "Hey, you dumb hippo!  You could not squash a fly, though you're so fat!"

            "Look who's talking about someone being dumb!" King Hippo snapped.

            "Hey, Eggplant Wizard!" called Dr. Wily.

            "Yes, Dr. Wily?" said Eggplant Wizard.

            Dr. Wily drew an IceRay!  "Let's see how you like living in the frozen - wheeze! - food section for a while!"  Wily froze Eggplant Wizard inside an ice block.

            "Yaaah!" the vegetable screamed.

            Mouser called, "Oh, Hippo!"

            "What is it, cheese-breath?" King Hippo demanded.

            Mouser drew what appeared to be a bomb on King Hippo.  "Want an explosive situation, Hippo?  Ha, ha, ha!"  He threw the 'bomb' at the petrified King Hippo.  When the fuse burned into the bomb and the bomb failed to explode, King Hippo laughed.  Mouser tossed a bomb at Eggplant Wizard.  When this bomb exploded, Eggplant Wizard was burst out of the ice block.

            "Ha, ha!" King Hippo laughed.  "I knew you were just kidding, Mouser."  Just then, a heavy dust was sprayed out of the bomb right up King Hippo's nose!  "I'll - achoo! - get you for - achoo! - this, mouse-brain!  Achoo, achoo, achoo!  I need a - achoo! - a handkerchief!  Achoo!  Achoo!  ACHOO!!!"

            Eggplant Wizard handed King Hippo his dustiest handkerchief.  "Here you are, King Hippo!"  King Hippo blew his nose on the handkerchief.

            King Hippo said, "Aaah!  Thanks, Egg-. . . achoo!  Why, you - achoo! - dirty double-crosser!  Achoo!  Achoo!  ACHOO!!!"  The audience all laughed loudly.

            Getting out a large chunk of cheese, Dr. Wily queried, "Want some cheese, Mouser?"

            "Yes," said Mouser.  "Thank you."

            Dr. Wily handed the cheese to Mouser.  "Take it."  As Mouser was eating it, Wily said, "It's my speciality. . ."  Once Mouser had finished, Wily concluded, ". . .tear-gas cheese!  Ha, ha, ha!"

            Crying, Mouser said, "Waah, hah, hah!  You dirty ra-. . . dirty trickster!  I'll get you for this!  Wah, hah, hah!"  While Mouser was crying, the audience was laughing.

            Ludwig was seated at a table near the stage.  "Ha, ha!  This is one job that those fools cannot bungle!"

            Next to Ludwig, MotherBrain laughed, "Hee, hee!  You're right."

            "When we get through here," Ludwig said, "we'll go back to my castle and devise our scheme of conquest."

            "Good idea, Ludwig!" said King Koopa, sitting next to Ludwig.

            Larry was sitting at a table near Ludwig's.  "In fact," Larry said, "when they enter Ludwig's castle any day after today, let's give them the adventure of their life. . . or, should I say, the adventure of their death!  Ha, ha, ha, ha!"  Just then, a tomato 'splatted' in the face of Morton, who was sitting next to Larry.

            Morton angrily jumped on the stage and got in Eggplant Wizard's face.  "Hey, you big, fat, dumb Eggplant!  Watch where you're throwing those tomatoes!"

            "Sorry, 'Big Mouth.'  I'll be careful next time."

            After having turned Eggplant Wizard around, while zapping him in the rear with his sceptre, Morton ordered, "Address me as a prince from now on, vegetable-brain, or we'll have fried Eggplant for dinner!  Do you understand, you lazy, stupid, moronic, idiotic, incompetent fool?"

            "Yes, Prince 'Big Mouth' Koopa!  Yes, yes!"  Everyone laughed loudly.

            Morton put away his sceptre.  "Okay, then.  NOW, CONTINUE THE ENTERTAINMENT, OR I'LL MAKE EGGPLANT SOUFFLÉ OUT OF YOU!!!"

            "Yes, Your Maniacal Yakkiness!"  Morton returned to his seat.  This crazy act continued until the cake was served at 17.10.  Everyone left at 18.00.  At 18.12, MotherBrain, King Koopa, and the Koopalings were leaving.

            At the return-warp to Metroid, Dracula said, "I hope you had a good time.  I had a blast!"

            MotherBrain said, "We did, too."

            "Yeah," said Ludwig.  "One whole day of this being nice to those good guys, though, is killing me!"

            "Yes," Bowser agreed.  "Good thing the nice part's over.  Ha, ha, ha!  Now we can go back to Ludwig Castle and plan our conquests!  Ha, ha, ha!"  MotherBrain and the Koopalings then laughed.  They warped to Metroid, then to where Neon Castle had been in Dino Land.

            * * *

            Neon Castle's Former Location, Valley of Koopa, Dinosaur Land, Mushroom World.

            Upon their arrival, Ludwig said, "Yes, they got Neon Castle, just as I had planned.  Therefore, we shall bring my castle here."

            Koopa asked, "How about a little Koopa Magic?"  He drew his sceptre.  "Magic sceptre, your power is not mere, bring Ludwig Castle over here.  Right where my castle's foundation stands, at that point, Ludwig Castle will stand."  When he had finished reciting the incantation, he blasted Neon Castle's foundation with his magic sceptre.  Ludwig Castle was magically transported from Chocolate Island to where Neon Castle had been.  Neon lights on Ludwig's Castle shone the same way as the word 'Koopa' had on Neon Castle. . . except that they said 'The Castle of Koopa.'

            "Is she not magnificent?" Ludwig asked.

            "I must say that your castle appears a work of genius, Ludwig," said Bowser.

            "Well, it took me all morning to build."

            "Ha, ha, ha!  Let's check it out."

            "Very well, but all of you must stay close.  Only I know the way around my castle fully. . . in fact, only I know my way around it at all.  It's very easy to get lost in, and that means a whole lot, since there's only one real path to my chamber."

            MotherBrain said, "Then, let's get started.  I have the mapper-chip installed in my tank's computer, so we can make ourselves a little map for this castle."

            "Good idea.  Three-fourths of my traps are very lethal."  About one hour later, they nearly totally made it through. . . down to the FINAL trap.

            Larry said, "Whew, Ludwig!  That would have been extremely difficult without you.

            "Well, that's not all," said Ludwig.

            "It isn't?" Bowser asked.

            "No.  Now comes my most lethal trap. . . the Metroid-pit!"

            "Oh, how absent-minded of me!"

            "And you say there's no way around that trap?" asked Roy.

            Ludwig said, "You bet."

            Larry said, "Let me at it.  If there's a way, I'm bound to find it."

            "If you do, let me know.  If there's anyone who can sniff out a way around a trap, it's you."

            Larry carefully examined the area, looking everywhere.  "Hmmm. . . now, let me see.  Here. . . nope.  There. . . nope.  Here. . . there. . . everywhere. . . nope.  There is normally a way around a very dangerous trap.  Not here. . . not here. . ."  He stared into the Metroid pit.  "Hmmm.  Lots of Metroids, brother."  He now concentrated on the wall closing off anyone who dared to consider leaping over the pit.  "That wall would bash anyone who tried to leap across the pit. . . that would cause someone to surely fall to their doom.  That wall. . . that wall. . . that. . . EUREKA!!!  I have it!!!"

            "What?"

            "My senses tell me that that wall is an illusion!  I just know it.  But, just in case,. . . Eggplant Wizard, do you have a strong string bean?"

            "Hmm.  Now, let me see.  Rutabagas?  Nope.  Squash?  Nope.  Ahh!  The toughest, stringiest, longest string bean you can imagine, and here it is."

            "Perfect!"  Larry tied it around himself.  "If I crash into the wall if it's not an illusion, pull me up, okay, Roy?"

            Roy agreed, "Sure!  Okay."

            Ludwig thought the idea was absurd.  He knew there was an illusion wall in the castle, but he could not remember where.  In fact, he was not certain that the illusion wall was not there.  "I put one hologram wall in this place.  I'm not sure where.  You could be right, but who knows?"

            "We'll find out soon enough.  Okay, Roy.  Throw me over!"

            Roy picked Larry up and held him over his head.  "Sure thing, Larry!"  He threw Larry.  "Bombs away!"  Larry passed through the hologram wall with the greatest of ease, stopping for one second when he literally reached the end of his rope, and fell to the ground.

            "Ooof!  Ha, ha, ha!" laughed Larry.  "What thinkest thou, Ludwig?"  Larry stepped to the wall.

            "Obviously, you were correct, Larry.  Now, I remember.  The hologram wall is here."  He stepped on an invisible floor platform suspended half-way between the ledges and the hologram wall.  "And the invisible floor platform is here.  Now, it's just a leap away."  Ludwig leapt through the illusion wall and landed on his feet on the floor beyond the wall.  "Come on, guys.  We're almost there."  Everyone else crossed the pit with ease.  They advanced to the chamber door.  "Here we are, guys.  Here's the ladder from the Metroid-pit, and here's the door."

            Koopa said, "Good work, son.  Now, how do we get the princesses here without breaking our necks through your brilliantly designed castle?"

            "Simple."  Ludwig removed a flask of warp potion from his shell.  "With this warp potion, it'll be easier than falling off a log for you to get to my chamber.  Watch."  Ludwig threw the flask on the floor.  A door appeared.  "Open that door, peer out it, and see if you can see the rear of the castle to the left and right."

            Koopa did so.  "I see, Ludwig, but will anyone see the door?"

            "On the outside, the door is invisible."

            "Then, how shall we see it?" asked Larry.

            "Literally, we shall not.  However, all brick patterns are different on the inside and outside of the castle.  Father, you could go out in order to look for a pattern since you're already there.

            Koopa looked above the door.  "Hmmm.  I see a pattern above the door unique from the other patterns. . . upside-down-T-block, upside-down-reverse-L, right-side-up-reverse-L, square, two side-by-side, vertical 4-bars, and regular Z.

            "Good!  I shall make the pattern out on several pieces of paper and give one piece to each of you so that you may memorise it.  Tomorrow, we shall put our deviously hideous plan into operation!  Larry and I shall warp to the Palace of Power and abduct those three dimwit princesses!  Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

            "Good!" said MotherBrain.  "I cannot wait to see the look on their faces!  Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

            * * *

            July 18.

            Northern Garden, just outside the Palace of Power, VideoLand.

            The next morning, at the Palace of Power, the three princesses were talking outside.  They were in their normal attire.  Little knew they, however, that Ludwig 'Kooky' von Koopa had made a warp potion that would take him and a brother of his directly to the princesses.

            "So how is your kingdom, Princess Zelda?" Princess Peach asked.

            Zelda was disgusted, but not even remotely at her friend.  She abhorred what had happened recently.  "It was okay. . . that is, until MotherBrain started trying to add that land to her rule as well.  Ganon by himself was bad enough, but MotherBrain is awful."

            Ludwig made the warp to the Palace of Power, taking him and Larry to a hidden area outside the palace near the three princesses.  They were in the bushes near Lana, Zelda, and Peach.  "Do you see that, Larry?  They are a regular trio of sitting ducks!"

            "Boy, I'll say!  When do we grab the dames. . . er, ladies?"

            "As soon as they walk back this way. . . they are doing so!  Come on, ladies. . . just a little closer. . ."

            After the princesses had reached the two Koopalings' bushes, Lana said, "Well, it sure has been rather peaceful since yesterday."

            Ludwig and Larry sprang up out of the bushes, and Ludwig exclaimed, "AND THE PEACE IS NOW BEING SHATTERED, FOOLS!!!  YOU REALLY THOUGHT THAT WE WERE GOING TO BE NICE, EH?!?!?"  In Spanish, he continued, "WELL, WE HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU THREE!!!"

            In English, Zelda said, "Sorry, but I do not know Spanish very well.  It is not as important in Hyrule as German, and it does not have the literary importance of French and Italian."

            "He said, 'Well, we have a surprise for you three!' " said Lana.

            Larry aimed his powerful Koopa-sceptre at the three princesses.  "Yes, ladies.  We have a free trip to Ludwig Castle in store for you!  And you are presently under arrest by the Koopa!"

            "You have the right to remain silent.  Anything you say can and will be used against you in the Court of Koopa," said Ludwig.

            "You have the right to an attorney present with you during questioning," Larry continued.  "If you cannot afford one, one will be appointed to you by the court.  You do not have to answer any questions without an attorney present."

            Lana laughed.  "You're joking!  You are not the law here, Ludwig 'Kooky' von Koopa!"

            �Au contraire, ma jolie princesse!  {Ó kawⁿh-trehr, mah zhó-lé prehⁿh-thehs!}  [French]  (On the contrary, my pretty princess!)� Ludwig said.  "As soon as you are tried and convicted, Mouser will be the law here.  Unless he does something incredibly stupid between now and the day I appoint a regent to this world."

            Trying to trick Larry, Lana said, "My, you look like a handsome hunk, Larry.  Before we leave,. . ."

            "Nuh, uh, Princess Lana.  I know you're trying to sweeten me up.  I am king of trickery."

            "Well, that will not work," Zelda said.

            Ludwig said, "Larry and I are not as stupid as we may look. . . we refuse to be treated like buffoons."  Just that minute, Metroid moved to a position very near the palace.

            MotherBrain called from within on the super-radio.  "You better do what my young men say, ladies!"

            Lana said, "Wait a minute!  The last time Metroid passed by, it looked like it had no power."

            "Are you kidding?  That was a cover-up.  We were actually in the Mushroom World, bringing Ludwig's super castle from Chocolate Island to the Valley of Koopa!  Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!  Soon, my intelligent Koopas and I will have supreme power, as rulers of VideoLand and the Mushroom World!  Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

            "Our friends will rescue us, MotherBrain!" Peach said.

            �Au contraire, ma petite princesse!  {Ó kawⁿh-trehr, mah'p-tét prehⁿh-thehs!}  [French]  (On the contrary, my little princess!)� said Ludwig.  "My new castle is so sophisticated that those goody-goods will not have a chance!"

            MotherBrain said, "Yes, so, if you don't mind, come quietly.  Consider yourselves now to be prisoners of the brain!  Ha, ha, ha, ha!"

            "First, I'll slap on the handcuffs," Larry said.  He snapped the handcuffs on the princesses' wrists while they had their hands behind their backs.  "Now, girls, enter that warp zone in the bushes from which we sprang."  They entered the warp zone and wound up in the throne room of Ludwig's castle, where King Koopa and the other five Koopalings were waiting.

            "Hello, ladies, and welcome to the 'Doomcastle'!" Bowser greeted.

            "And I'll have you know that there is no nickname more fitting than that for my castle," said Ludwig.

            "Ludwig's a genius. . . a sheer genius!  If you knew the layout of this castle, you could not help but agree!"

            Peach demanded, "What are you up to, Bowser Koopa?"

            "Oh, it is not what I am up to, Your Naïveness. . . it is what Ludwig is up to!"

            Ludwig activated the visual communicator.  "This is Prince Ludwig 'Kooky' von Koopa calling Queen MotherBrain. . . come in, Your Braininess."

            MotherBrain appeared with excellent reception on the monitor of Ludwig's visual communicator.  "I copy, Your Extreme Intelligence.  What's up?"

            "I have these three princesses here, just as planned."

            "Excellent!"

            "Are you and Ridley ready to deliver the message to those idiotic good guys?"

            "Ready and waiting, Ludwig."

            "Good.  You may give it right now, MotherBrain."  The communication was cut.

            * * *

            MotherBrain's Control Room, Tourian, Metroid, VideoLand.

            MotherBrain pulled a lever with her tentacle.  "This is Queen MotherBrain calling the N-Team and Mario Brothers.  Come in, nice-guys."

            Captain N appeared on one of MotherBrain's monitors.  "What is it, MotherBrain?"

            "My boys have your three princesses, and, if you do not work all the way through the Mushroom World, you will never see them again!  Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!  Unless, of course, you hand over the Kingdom of VideoLand to me!"  She cut the communication.

            * * *

            Main Communication Station, Throne Room, Palace of Power, VideoLand.

            "Oh great!" said Kevin.

            MegaMan entered.  "What is it, Captain N?"

            "MotherBrain has told me that those cruddy Koopas have our princesses."

            "How do you know it's not a mega-trick?"

            "I just know, MegaMan.  The princesses aren't back from their walk in the garden."

            Kid Icarus flew in.  "What is it, Kevin?"

            "Bowser and his Koopalings have the three princesses."

            "Oh, no!  That is terriblus maximus!"

            "I'd like you two to call everyone and have them meet in the assembly room."

            "You've got it, Kevin-icus."

            "Yes, Captain N," MegaMan said.

            * * *

            Control Room, Ludwig's Castle, Valley of Koopa, Mushroom World.

            Ludwig was watching on the monitor in his castle.  "It should appear as though we shall be having a hot time in the old world tonight, boys!"

            Every one of the other six Koopalings shouted, "Yay!"

            Koopa said, "The 'yays' have it!  YAY!!!"

            "Now, now.  In order to smash these good guys into the ground, we'll need battle plans!  Ha, ha, ha!"

            "Right-o!  Ludwig, you could create an invisible barrier around the planet, right?"

            "I have anticipated your question, Dad!"  He went to a new device.  "This nifty new gizmo will block off all sections of the Mushroom World, and it will cause all present warps to the Mushroom World to lead to the Mushroom Kingdom, Dream Land, Sarasaland, Grass Land, Desert Land, and Water Land, Larry's territory."  He activated the fiendish device.  "Larry, prepare for visitors."

            "Yes, my sinister brother!  I'll ready my Doomship!"

            "Doomship?" King Koopa asked, surprised.

            Morton said, "Oh!  We forgot to tell you, King Dad,. . ."

            Roy continued, ". . .that we kept our old Doomships to travel on!"

            "What do you think of that, King Dad?" asked Wendy.  In warped MotherBrain, Eggplant Wizard, King Hippo, Dr. Wily, Mouser, and Ridley.

            Koopa said, "Ha, ha, ha!  You clever Koopalings!  You know how to make a daddy proud.  Larry, to your six kingdoms. . ."

            Larry put his hand to his head in a salute.  "Aye, aye, King Dad!  I'll fix those rotten goody-goods!"  Larry ran out the back door to his Doomship.  He left.  Bowser Koopa turned to Morton.

            "Now, Morton," said MotherBrain, "get over to Flood City and blow your hot air all over that world!"

            "You've got it, MotherBrain!  Yes, indeedie!  You've certainly got it! Yes, madam!  I definitely. . ."

            In a warning tone, MotherBrain asked, "Will you cease your vocal operations and get over there already?"

            "Immediately."  He ran out to his Doomship.  "I shall not let you down!"

            "Okay, sister, now you may get back to your Mirror City, which used to be Pipe Land," Ludwig said.

            Wendy said, "You've got it, Ludwig."  Running out to her Doomship, she called back, "See you all later!"

            "Lemmy and Iggy, get over to Dark Land, and put some more light on the subjects!" Bowser said.  "Ha, ha, ha!"

            "Yup!" said Iggy and Lemmy, running out.  "See you later!"

            MotherBrain said, "Roy, go to western Dino Land and give those cave freaks a run for their money!  Hee, hee, hee!"

            Running out to his Doomship, Roy said, "MotherBrain, I'm solid gone!  See ya later, green daddy-o!"

            "See you later, Roy, my boy!" King Koopa said.

            Ludwig looked out a window.  "Well, they have all left.  Eggplant, Hippo, Wily, ProtoMan, Mouser, and Ridley, front and centre!"

            When they all reached the centre of the room, King Hippo asked, "What is it, your mad-scientist magnificence?"

            The prince of evil drew his sceptre slowly and angrily at King Hippo.  "You can call me weird, you may call me eccentric, you have the permission to call me crazy, you are even permitted to go so far as to call me loony, but you may NEVER, I mean NEVER, I mean NEVER, I mean NEVER, I mean NEVER, I mean NEVER, I mean NEVER CALL ME MAD!!!"  He fired a strong bolt at King Hippo, which King Hippo dodged.  Ludwig breathed loudly.  "DO YOU GET MY POINT, BOZO?!?  ONLY MEMBERS OF MY FAMILY MAY DESCRIBE ME WITH THAT WORD!!!"

            MotherBrain picked King Hippo up with her tentacle and raised him up to in front of her glass jar.  "Yes, bozo.  Do you get it?"

            "I catch your drift!  I catch your drift!"

            Ludwig said, "Bright lad."  Eggplant Wizard began giggling in very low volume, attempting to keep it hidden from the others.

            MotherBrain, King Koopa, and Ludwig demanded, "WHAT'S SO FUNNY, EGGPLANT WIZARD?!?!?"

            Eggplant Wizard looked around.  "Who, me?"

            MotherBrain said, "Yes, you!"  MotherBrain positioned King Hippo over Eggplant Wizard.  Eggplant Wizard looked up.  She let go of King Hippo, who hovered over Eggplant for a second or two.  Eggplant scrambled to leave, with all the eggplants popping out of him.  Hippo fell *SPLAT!* on Eggplant.

            Eggplant Wizard popped his head out from under Hippo and said, "N-n-n-nothing, MotherBrain."

            "That is right!" said MotherBrain.  "Especially for those poor souls at the Palace of Power.  Soon, our all-out attack on the Mushroom World will swallow them.  Then we, great-looking gods and goddesses who we are, shall become rulers of VideoLand!  Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

            "Yes," said Ludwig.  "Then I'll be the despotic prince in charge of VideoLand!  Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

            Koopa said, "Yes, my dear brain.  Without the princesses to lead them, it will not be long before all those lands fall under our control."

            "Ludwig, please tune into the Palace of Power," MotherBrain said.  "We'll see what their course of action is."

            "Correct," said Ludwig.  He tuned into the Palace of Power, where the N-Team, Mario-Team, Link, and Samus Aran (yes, that female space-hunter who had given MotherBrain her brain surgery) had congregated for a meeting.  Samus was about Kevin's height naturally.  She wore a space suit with orange arms, a red helmet and a red piece that covered the upper torso.  It included a yellow piece that covered the lower torso down to the knees and orange boots that, in back, came up to the knees and, on the front, came up all the way to the top of the legs.  On her right arm from the hand almost to the elbow was a green cannon.  A piece of nearly indestructible glass was in front of her eyes and nose, and two green tubes went from the cheek areas of the helmet to the nose area.  Her body itself was strong; she had blue eyes and blonde hair.  She wore nothing but a black jump-suit underneath when in her suit; the suit provided plenty of protection from extreme temperatures.

            MotherBrain said, "Uh, oh!  It looks like trouble. . . Samus Aran!"

            "Yes, it's she.  I've heard about that powerful woman before.  I understand your complex about her, MotherBrain.  She is the one who nearly destroyed you."

            MotherBrain said, "It was too close for comfort, son. . . WAY too close.  Every time a Metroid creature is destroyed, my brain undergoes a rather severe shock.  Every time this planet sustains a blast, I am affected as well.  The only way to destroy me is to destroy SR388 and all Metroid creatures.  As long as there is at least one Metroid left in the entire universe, I am never destroyed.  Now, they are in an intense growth period. . . all the better for me.  The planet SR388 is made up of my own brain cells, which I can turn into Metroid eggs at will.  I am the one determined to multiply Metroids and keep them in abundance. . . I am the one responsible for their welfare. . . I and the only one with whom I have had a brain transplant, that is."

            "I know who he is, too, son," Bowser said.

            "Who?" asked Ludwig.

            "King Bowser Koopa," said MotherBrain.

            "I see.  And I suppose that's what attracted you two together.  But why Dad?"

            Bowser said, "My brain had gone sour.  It was going to go 'KA-BLOOIE!' any instant.  So, I needed to get some new brain transplanted into my head."

            "At the same time, I had too much brain to fit into my glass jar, so I needed to get it removed."

            "The part she needed removed was the very same size as my whole brain.  The new brain made itself into an individual brain, an incredible morphing ability that the surgeons had discovered.  And the rest of her brain compensated for the loss.  And we are linked telepathically."

            "Hmm.  So, you each have the same brain, huh?" Ludwig said.

            "So do you and your siblings, Ludwig.  Since I created your eggs through magic, I was able to donate some of the most important elements of the brain."

            "I see.  Well!  Go on."

            MotherBrain continued, "My brain controls all the creatures on the planet SR388, or planet Metroid."

            "From what I read, I was under the impression that SR388 was destroyed by the creature Metroid."

            "I know.  That happened when those fools from the Galactic Federal Police, stationed in MegaLand, sent a ship to get a few Metroid specimens and hold them in suspended animation, and they would become mobile again if exposed to beta rays for 24 hours.  I decided to step in.  Just before SR388 was destroyed - or so the fools thought - I escaped with my evil warriors, those who are in the game Metroid.  I created that band of space pirates and took back the Metroid whom those fools had stolen.  They knew that the creature would destroy all life forms by clinging to the living thing's body and absorbing all of its energy.  Even one Metroid left in the universe would be dangerous to all life forms except for me, who control them.  I planned to take it to the centre of Planet Zebes, which I did.  I planned to expose it to beta rays as my warriors tried to stop Samus Aran.  Kraid. . . oh, that poor creature!  Samus blasted him into moonbeams with her Wave Beam.  Luckily, Ridley and I had escaped, but narrowly.  Ridley went on before me just before Samus reached his lair; she blew the stuffing out of his impostor.  When my precious Metroids tried to destroy her, she destroyed all but one.  Just one Metroid was left on SR388.  Then, my Zebetites and Rinkas tried to stop that unstoppable Samus Aran, but they failed.  The Rinkas were my last defence before I had to come face-to-face with Samus herself.  That was until my impostor was ready.  I got out just in the nick of time, and she blasted my clone to pieces.  I tried to stop her with the atomic time bomb, but she escaped up the shaft before the bomb exploded.  I returned to SR388, where I rebuilt the Planet Metroid.  Then, I once again bred the Metroids and, before I could blink, Samus had ruined my plans again!  My Alpha Metroids, Gamma Metroids, Zeta Metroids, and Omega Metroids were all blasted to bits by that meddler!  Fortunately, I had the mutated Metroids in one section of the planet.  She was denied access to the portion where I had myself with half of my regular Metroids."

            "Blast that Samus Aran!  Let's listen to these goody-two-shoes."  They deactivated the mute, and the good people's voices came over the audio circuits.

            Captain N said, "If we warp to the Mushroom World, we'll have to figure a way to get through Ludwig 'Kooky' von Koopa's Castle.  We'll also probably have to beat all the evil Koopalings in order to achieve success."

            "Yes," agreed Mario.  He pointed to a loop on the warp map.  "According to this map, the most reliable warp zone to the Mushroom World would be here, in the Metroid Warp Loop."

            Dr. Xavier Wright (a.k.a. Dr. Thomas Xavier Light in the American MegaMan games) said, "Yes.  That Warp Loop will definitely take us to the Mushroom World.  If we travel within its radiation field, which is about one million kilometres from the surface of Metroid at all times, we should warp automatically to the Mushroom World."  He was a little shorter than Dr. Wily, and he had a full head of white hair with a white moustache and beard and black eyebrows.  He wore a white lab-coat with red pants and a blue shirt.

            "Good of you to join us, Samus," Kevin said.  "We'll need your help, I'm sure."

            "Yes, Captain N," said Samus.  Her voice was that of a deep alto, one of the only things, other than determination, that she had in common with MotherBrain.  Except, of course, that Samus's accent was quite British.  "MotherBrain is a tough customer.  Fortunately, I've finally captured that drug-ring, after several years of hard work.  Otherwise, I'd have been here sooner to help smash MotherBrain."

            "How can she be destroyed?" Luigi asked.

            "She can only be destroyed by destroying the planet Metroid and all Metroid creatures in the universe.  Even then, even if we could seek down and destroy all the Metroid creatures, if we destroyed her, with her brain-link with King Bowser and the Koopalings, the powerful explosions from their brains would destroy the entire galactic cluster.  It would be a supernova the size of ten enormous galaxies, at the very least.  Bowser's brain is from MotherBrain.  She had too much brain, and Bowser was literally brain-dead.  Twenty-four hours and he would not have survived.  So, a successful brain transplant occurred with the two, and their brains have been linked ever since.  So all nine of them suffer from the same brain shocks whenever a Metroid creature is destroyed, or whenever the planet Metroid receives a shock."

            "You mean to say that if MegaMan hit Metroid with his GeminiLaser right now, MotherBrain and King Koopa and the Koopalings would feel it?" Mario asked.

            Samus said, "Yes."

            MotherBrain screamed, "No!  Don't hit Metroid with the GeminiLaser!"

            The evil ones in Ludwig's castle saw MegaMan looking out the window of the Palace of Power.  "Hey, look!" the Blue Bomber said.  "Metroid's passing by!  Let's see what happens when I fry it with the GeminiLaser."  MegaMan fired a GeminiLaser from the MegaBuster in his left hand.  (He could form either hand into a MegaBuster.)  He hit Metroid on a rebound from the GeminiLaser, smacking it with a rather powerful blast.

            "Oww!  Oooh!  Stop that, you mechanical idiot!  Gah!  Ooh!  Yow!  Oof!"  Her face moved around in strange circles.

            Ludwig almost lost his balance.  "Yaah!  That sharp pain!  Ooch!  Ow!  Yow!  Gah!  Aack!  Whatever happens to you happens to me!"

            Koopa said, "Me, - ow! - too.  Ow!  Ouch!  Oof!  Grr!  Blaaack!  Aargh!  Aieee!  Oof!"

            Ridley, Wily, and ProtoMan were extremely concerned.  Wily said, "Oh, no.  This is serious."

            "This is indeed!" Ridley said.  "I'll summon the others.  King Hippo!  Eggplant Wizard!  Mouser!  Get in here, you fools!"  The three came in.

            "Uh-oh!  What's happening, you three?" King Hippo asked.

            "Take the warp to Metroid and get it away from the Palace of Power, you fat slob," Ridley ordered King Hippo.  "Eggplant and Mouser, man the hologram projector.  Hurry up and do it, you confounded idiots!  We haven't time for MotherBrain's confirmation!"

            "Okay, Ridley," said Eggplant.  "Let's do it, Brain-Team!"  The fools did as Ridley had commanded.

            "Good work, my dear Ridley!" Wily said.  "You still intimidate those fools well."

            "Thank you, Jerome.  Hey, you stupid ignorami!  Why don't Wily, Proto, and I see the N-Team yet?!?"

            "We're on it!" Eggplant complained.  He whispered, "Puff."

            "If you - ooch! - refer to him as that again, you're a dead - ouch! - veggie!" MotherBrain said.  MotherBrain, Bowser, Ludwig, Ridley, ProtoMan, and Wily saw a hologram of the window through which MegaMan was looking, and they saw MegaMan.

            "Whoa!  MotherBrain, Bowser Koopa, Ludwig von Koopa, Dr. Wily, ProtoMan, and Ridley are projecting their holograms outside the window!"

            "Right first time, brother!" said ProtoMan.

            Captain N appeared in the window.  "Well, MotherBrain!  How does that feel?"

            MotherBrain said, "I'll say, - ow! - if you do that one more time, your princesses will get it!  Oof!  And you will get it from my stupid yet faithful servants!"

            "Well, big brain, if you harm one hair on the princesses' chinny-chin-chins, we'll blast the heck out of Metroid," Mario warned.

            "Oof!  Small price to pay, pasta twerp!  Ah!  The side effects of the blast have died down.  Now you listen here, Mario!  If you so much as touch the surface of Metroid, your princesses are going to be toast!  Hee, hee, hee, hee, hee!"

            "Well, with all my weapons, I can blast the planet Metroid, and you will wish you were destroyed," MegaMan said.

            Ludwig said, "I'm glad Samus has told you, mega-brain-midget.  We cannot be destroyed unless you destroy all Metroid creatures, including the Metroid-upgrades, and the planet Metroid!  And that is not a load of baloney, you know!"

            "Yeah!" said Koopa.  "And with our six powerful castles made of Tetris blocks, we can. . ."

            MotherBrain tied her tentacles around Bowser Koopa's mouth.  "Uh-oh!  You've spilt it, dear."

            "Yeah.  Nice going, Father."

            After MotherBrain had released his mouth, Bowser asked, "Why, MotherBrain?"

            "You nice-guys better not tangle with us. . . unless, of course, you want the adventure of your life. . . or, should I say, the adventure of your death?" Ludwig said.

            MotherBrain laughed.  "Ludwig's right.  Keep away from the castles.  Threaten you later!"  Eggplant and Mouser deactivated the hologram projector, and the Palace of Power hologram vanished.  "Bowser, there is such a thing as the Sacred Square of Tetris that can be used to control Tetris blocks.  With it, the N-Team can easily decimate the castles."

            "Oops!" said Bowser.  "My big claptrap!"

            "Fear not," Ludwig said.  "I know who is in possession of the key to the Chamber of Tetris.  I can get to him and steal the key.  Once the Sacred Square is in my possession, I will be able to fortify our castles.  We shall be able to turn the very walls into treacherous weapons!"

            "Hm!" Bowser said.  "I guess you'd better hurry, then."

            "Yes.  Even though I can stop them myself, it will be interesting to see what the N-Team does when I add a blockfall!  Ha, ha, ha!"

            "Ooh, boy!" said Eggplant Wizard.  "I can't wait!  It'll be fun watching the N-Team get fried in your castle, Prince Ludwig!"

            "Yes, it will.  Now, idiots, go down to my Doomship.  Load the following items onto it.  Got a sheet?"

            King Hippo got a small spiral notebook out of his pocket and opened it to a clean sheet.  "Got it, boss."

            "Good.  Now, write this down."

            "Oh.  I ain't got a pen."

            "Then get one off the computer table, you idiot!  Why do you think I have a surplus of pens there?!?  Sheesh!"

            "Oh."  King Hippo got a pen off the table.  "Shoot, boss."

            "Now, I want you to load the following items onto my Doomship:  my instant fold-up lab, Wily's Robot Masters, my Clowncar, and a box of MotherBrain's instant Metroids.  Got it?"

            "Got it, boss!" said King Hippo.

            "Then get out of here, and don't return until you've completed your task."