Congregation Hall, Palace of Power, VideoLand, Milky Way Galaxy, Q-niverse.  Stardate 1 066 967.12; June 18, 3012.

At 11.00 sharp, everyone was in place and ready to begin.  "I'm glad you could all come this morning," said Wilykit.  "Now, Steelheart, would you call roll, please?"

            Steelheart stood.  "With pleasure, Wilykit."  She picked up her data padd.  "From the Thunder Cats division.  Lion-O."

            "Here," said Lion-O.

            "Lord Wilykit."

            "Here."

            "Wilykat."

            "Here."

            "Wily-johanna, Wilykit's daughter."

            "Here."

            "Wily-johannes, 'Kit's son."

            "Here."

            "Tygra."

            "Here."

            "Cheetara."

            "Here."

            "Bengali."

            "Here."

            "Pumyra."

            "Here."

            "Panthro."

            "Here."

            "Lynx-O."

            "Here."

            "Snarf."

            "Here."

            "Snarfer."

            "Here."

            "Astutus-gatito."

            "Here."

            "Astutus-gatita."

            "Here."

            "Tygra-chatonne."

            "Here."

            "Tygra-gatinha."

            "Here."

            "Cerebrantonio."

            "Here."

            "Cerebraguillaume."

            "Here."

            "Farfâlanatalia."

            "Here."

            "Farfâlaleonarda."

            "Here."

            "Astucieux-élisabeth."

            "Here."

            "Astucieux-frédéric."

            "Here."

            "Honorary member Ludwig van Beethoven."

            "Here."

            "Very well.  From the Silver Hawks division.  I, Commander Steelheart, am here.  At least I hope so.  Lieutenant Steelwill."

            "Here."

            "Doctor Colonel Quicksilver."

            "Here."

            "Captain Bluegrass."

            "Here."

            "Honorary member Melodia."

            "Here."

            "Sergeant Copper-Kidd."

            "Here."

            "Stargazer."

            "Here."

            "Hotwing."

            "Here."

            "Captain Flashback."

            "Here."

            "Moonstriker."

            "Here."

            "Condor."

            "Here."

            "Very good.  From the Mario-Team and Good Koopas division.  Mario."

            "Here."

            "Luigi."

            "Here."

            "Toad."

            "Here."

            "Yoshi."

            "Here."

            "Queen Peach Toadstool."

            "Here."

            "King Spike Koopa."

            "Here."

            "Prince Luis de(Spike)Koopa."

            "Here."

            "Prince Larry (Spike)Koopa."

            "Here."

            "Prince Roy."

            "Here."

            "Princess Wendy."

            "Here."

            "Prince Morton."

            "Here."

            "Prince Lemmy."

            "Here."

            "Prince Iggy."

            "Here."

            "Very well.  From the N-Team Base division.  Captain N, or Prince Kevin Keene."

            "Here."

            "Prince Thomas Keene, Kevin's son."

            "Here."

            "Princess Kelly Keene, Kevin's daughter."

            "Here."

            "Princess Lana Deschain Keene."

            "She is absent," said Kevin for the record.  "I further stipulate that MegaMan, MegaMan X, and Chief Samus Aran are all absent."

            "Very well.  Dr. Cain."

            "Here."

            "Simon Belmont."

            "Here."

            "Kid Icarus."

            "Here."

            "Queen Zelda Harkinian."

            "Here."

            "King Link Chance."

            "Here."

            "Prince Heinrich Harkinian, Link and Zelda's son."

            "Here."

            "Princess Liselotte, their daughter."

            "Here."

            "Lord James Chemsos."

            "Here."

            "Lady Jane Physicost."

            "Here."

            "Lord Zan of Exor."

            "Here."

            "Lady Jayna."

            "Here."

            "Batman."

            "Here."

            "Robin."

            "Here."

            "Zorro and Felipe."

            "We are here," Zorro said.

            "Very well.  From the Mason-Team."

            "Pardon me," said Mason.  "I stipulate, Commander, as to Lt. Tragg's absence."

            "Thank you.  Perry Mason."

            "Here."

            "Della Street."

            "Here."

            "Paul Drake, Sr."

            "Here."

            "Paul Drake, Jr."

            "Here."

            "Rupert Jackson."

            "Here."

            "Ken Malanski."

            "Here."

            "Chief Prosecuting Officer Lord Hamilton Burger."

            "Here."

            "Lieutenant Anderson."

            "Here."

            "Lieutenant Steve Drumm."

            "Here."

            "Sergeant Brice."

            "Here."

            "All right.  From the Justice Ducks division.  Darkwing Duck."

            "Here."

            "Launchpad McQuack."

            "Here."

            "Gosalyn Mallard."

            "Here."

            "GizmoDuck."

            "Here."

            "Morganna McCawber."

            "Here."

            "Neptunia."

            "Here."

            "Stegmutt."

            "Here."

            "Scrooge McDuck."

            "Here."

            "Huey Duck."

            "Here."

            "Dewey Duck."

            "Here."

            "Louie Duck."

            "Here."

            "Mrs. Beakley."

            "Here."

            "Webby."

            "Here."

            "Duckworth."

            "Here."

            "Mrs. Crackshell."

            "Here."

            "Director Hooter."

            "Here."

            "Agent Grizzlykov."

            "Here."

            "Very well.  From the Enterprise-Team."

            Picard said, "Please excuse me.  I stipulate that Cadet Wesley Crusher and Jean-Léonard Picard are absent."

            "All right.  Lord Captain Jean-Luc Picard."

            "Here."

            "Dr. Beverly Picard."

            "Here."

            "Commander William Riker."

            "Here."

            "Lieutenant Commander Data."

            "Here."

            "Lieutenant Commander Geordi LaForge."

            "Here."

            "Counsellor Deanna Troi."

            "Here."

            "Lieutenant Worf."

            "Here."

            "Lieutenant Robin Lefler."

            "Here."

            "All right.  From the Super-Human Samurai Syber-Squad.  Sam Collins."

            "Here."

            "Jennifer Doyle."

            "Here."

            "Tanker."

            "Here."

            "Sydney Forrester."

            "Here."

            "Yolanda Prachert."

            "Here."

            "Very well.  Finally, from our division from the X-iverse, the X-Men."

            Professor Xavier said, "Pardon me, Commander.  I stipulate that Rogue is absent."

            "Thank you.  Professor Charles Xavier."

            "Here."

            "Cyclops, or Scott Summers."

            "Here."

            "Jean Grey Summers."

            "Here."

            "Wolverine, or Logan."

            "Here."

            "Storm."

            "Here."

            "Beast, or Dr. Hank McCoy."

            "Present."

            "Jubilee, or Jubilation Lee."

            "Here."

            "All right.  I believe that concludes it.  Everyone not imprisoned on Metroid is in here."

            "Thank you, Commander," said Wilykit.  "First, I congratulate you people on crushing the Brain-Team.  Keep it up.  Also, good job, Silver Hawks and Syber-Squad, on managing to capture Malcolm Frink."  She drew the Sword of Omens and held it so all could see it.  "My daughter, Johanna, has reforged the Sword, thus restoring the power of the Eye of Thundera."  She re-sheathed the Sword.  "However, not Ganon but the evil Mumm-ra took the Ring of the Nibelung, and he has delivered it to Ludwig."  Some quiet moans were heard around the table.  "It's not good, but it's not terrible, either.  Those items are not powerful enough to save the evil Ludwig.  We'll take him down.  The full report is in the computer, and it's accessible to the whole team.

            "Now," continued Wilykit, "I believe Ludwig may attempt to conquer the Original Universe next.  Steelwill and Kid Icarus, since you two monitor communications quite a bit, I'd like you two to see if Ludwig sends transmissions to the Galaxy of Léi.  If he does, I'd like you to determine the substance of that transmission and inform me of your discovery as soon as possible."

            Steelwill let out a low whistle.  "That's a tall task," he commented.  "What are you looking for?"

            "Any sort of communication.  If you'd like, I can explain in more detail after the meeting."

            "Sure."

            "Certainly, Wilykit-us," Kid Icarus said.

            "Thank you, gentlemen," said Wilykit.  "Now, Mr. Burger, I hear that you are prosecuting Mr. Frink yourself."

            "I am," Burger said.  "Steelheart has provided good evidence against him.  I feel certain that we can prove he did this."

            "Limbo law takes a very dim view on computer hackers who use those skills for criminal purposes," said Steelheart.  "Everything in our computers that cannot be accessed directly is classified and closed to all non-N-Team interests, including the Mob.  We can justify that, and we can show that it takes a smart and determined person to even try to break in.  Plus, we have the computer records, recorded by devices with which not even I can tamper."

            "At least I'm not judging this case," Kevin said.  "Otherwise, you'd have to be quiet about it while I'm around."

            "At least none on my division is appointed to represent Frink," said Mason.  "Hm.  Hamilton, MotherBrain and Ludwig, despite their evil tendencies, do have the pleasant habit of telling the truth on the witness stand.  They might know something about this."

            "All right," Burger said.  "Thank you, Perry.  Attempting to question them may prove prudent."

            "Mr. Burger," said Steelheart, "Mon*Star and Hardware could be material witnesses.  Hardware and Zero, in fact, were present at the time."

            "I see.  I'll ask the judge to make out subpoenas, and I'll ask you to serve them."

            "A very good idea, Mr. Burger."

            "You guys may continue this conversation later," Wilykit said.  "For now, if you don't mind, I'd like to address other matters."

            "Very well," said Steelheart.

            "Speaking of Mon*Star, in case anyone is interested, the Silver Hawks have just made available a file concerning him.  I forewarn you that, as I understand it, the file describes a much nastier Mon*Star, what the villain was like when he was younger.  It is not for those who can't control their emotional reaction, according to Stargazer, who wrote it.  If you choose to read it, I advise you to be wary of your anger.  Now, let's talk about the people trapped on Metroid.  Kevin, I understand that while you and Quicksilver were saving Tally-Hawk on Metroid, you found the others with your tricorder."

            "Yes, I did," said Kevin.  "Princess Lana and Wesley are in a room in upper Norfair.  I believe it's just off the shaft that leads back up to Brinstar.  At any rate, it's in the Maridia-Brinstar-Norfair zone.  The others are as deep into Norfair as the path can get, just off Ridley's lair.  I almost did not detect them, for there's a bit of shielding.  MotherBrain has inner Metroid pretty well shielded from our methods of detection.  That, in fact, is certainly something we should be working on."

            "All right," said Wilykit.  "I agree, Kevin.  We can take care of that when we've finished here.  What else is there?"

            "This afternoon at 16.00," Kevin said, "as I have discussed with Queen Toadstool and Prince Luis, I shall officially take the throne of VideoLand, as I am Princess Lana's husband, since she has trained me to be a ruler, and since she is not around to rule.  It will be held on the Palace Lawn, with twenty major reporters from this galaxy and the Galaxy of Leos reporting live.  I'd appreciate it if as much of the N-Team as possible were here for that."

            "All right," said Wilykit.  "I'm certain all our activities can be suspended for this.  So, for that time and for the duration of the ceremony, all Thunder Cats are relieved of all other duties and are requested to be at the ceremony.  Since we're each acquainted with Kevin, it would be very nice of us to do this. . . and for the Lord of the Thunder Cats to be there."

            Steelheart said, "It would be good of us, also, to be there.  Thus, all Silver Hawks are relieved of duty from 14.30 until 22.00 today.  I expect to see everyone there, and I'm sure none of us has any problems with that."

            "Kevin's a good friend guys," said Mario to the members of his division.  "He's led us through many scrapes.  It would be good of us all to come."

            Link said to the others of the N-Team Base, "Kevin has led us very well.  It would be very good of us all to witness this event."

            All the other leaders similarly affirmed that their divisions should be at the ceremony this afternoon.  "Thank you, guys," Kevin said finally.

            "Now," asked Wilykit, "is there anything else?"  No one spoke up.  "I think one thing's on our minds. . . what happens if the Brain-Team attacks.  More likely, in this thing, they'll show up and gloat.  That's what I'd expect.  Of course, if they attack anything, we'll let some of you take care of it. . . just enough of you to overpower the Brain-Team members.  I sincerely doubt they'll attack during the time of the ceremony, however.  Well, if that's all,. . ."  No one spoke up.  ". . .then that's the end of this meeting.  Thank you all, again, for coming."  Everyone stood.

            * * *

            Control Room, Tourian, Metroid, VideoLand.

            MotherBrain and her wicked compatriots, to include all the division leaders, were watching the meeting.  "Excellent," said MotherBrain.

            "For me, the situation is not at all excellent," Mon*Star said softly and threateningly.  "When I get my Light*Star on that bloody Steelwill, I'm going to destroy him!!"

            "Mon*Star, cool off, please," said Mumm-ra.  "It is unseemly to lose your temper about this.  We'll get them for this, of course, but now is not the appropriate time."

            Negaduck said, "What are we going to hit during the ceremony?"

            "Nothing," Ludwig said.  "As natives of the third of the galaxy defined to be VideoLand, the Brain-Team Base shall witness the coronation of Captain N.  The entire team is expected to do this, as well."

            "How are we to watch?" asked Mon*Star.  "Our computers are demolished!"

            "You shall come here, then," MotherBrain said.  "Later, we shall repair your computer systems.  This afternoon, after Captain Nerdnick's official coronation, Luna, Mumm-ra, Ludwig, and I shall appear there and announce publicly our possession of the Ring and of the two Triforces.  Our do-gooding friends will not appreciate it.  For now, we have a little assault to plan.  Heinrich, Liselotte, Kelly, Thomas, Johanna, and Johannes are having lunch on Hyrule today.  Ganon and eleven Brain-Team members shall lead an assault.  Who of you volunteers yourselves or members?  I don't want to use the idiots for this.  Let's smack those brats with some of our worst."

            "Hardware should be delighted," said Mon*Star.  "Also, Windhammer."

            "Three down, nine to go."

            "Aluro, Luna with Amok, and Chilla could go, too," said Mumm-ra.

            "Six down.  I'll have Dr. Wily, Ridley, and Nuclesís go.  This makes nine, three more to go."

            Liquidator said, "I'll go with Mega Volt and Bushroot."

            "Twelve it is.  Thank you, everyone."

            Ludwig said, "Call your selected people in here so I can explain the plot."  Everyone made calls.

            Soon afterwards, Mumm-ra had transformed, and Hardware, Windhammer, Mumm-ra, Luna with Amok, Aluro, Dr. Wily, Ridley, Nuclesís, Liquidator, Bushroot, and Mega Volt were all in the room to receive their orders.  Ganon said, "We are here because we are going to cause great harm to six brats on Hyrule."

            "What juvenile twerps shall we have the pleasure of annihilating?" Windhammer asked.

            "We shall be annihilating no one.  However, we shall be attacking Link's kids, Kevin's kids, and Wilykit's kids while they have lunch on Hyrule this afternoon."

            "Great!" exclaimed Mega Volt.

            "Though Ganon is leading this little attack," Ludwig said, "if things get rough, Liquie, I want you to take charge."  He went over to his first officer and secretly whispered, "Supervise him, anyway. . . in your capacity as First Officer of the Brain-Team, if for no other justifiable reason.  I don't want that pig getting to big for his britches."

            "With pleasure, Emperor," said Liquidator.

            "If anyone, for some odd reason, wishes to perform any legitimate business exchanges on Hyrule before the attack," Ganon said, "you will require money in Hyrulian Rupees or in VideoLand Pounds in hard coin or paper currency.  Everything is relatively inexpensive there, and I still am patriotic enough to at least wish for the economy to get better."

            "I'll give everyone fifty pounds," said Ludwig.  "That way, we can baffle the good guys by rendering some degree of assistance.  Believe me, fifty pounds can go anywhere on Hyrule nowadays."  He went to his money vault and withdrew twelve fifty-pound notes.  He then handed them to his allies.  "Voilà.  Lunch is on me.  Just remember, I only want you causing trouble.  I do not want you to permanently damage those six kids, though you may break a bone or two.  Attempt to apprehend, if possible, but not all of them."

            "Certainly," said Ganon.

            "Have fun, guys.  See you later."  His twelve malicious comrades left for Hyrule.  "MotherBrain, is Ridley really going himself?"

            "Yes," MotherBrain said.  "I'm protecting him from destruction with my Q-cubed powers."

            "Very well.  I have planned, fortunately, on Wilykit attempting to detect my signal to the Borg.  I nested a command for the Borg to enter stasis if I ever had to cease communications with them."

            "Good idea," said Larry.

            "I just avoid contact for the next couple of hours, and the Borg are all in stasis until we need 'em.  That way, our friends on the N-Team won't find our connection."

            "Wonderful," Bowser said.  "Ludwig, I have decided I should accompany you when you go conquer the Original Universe."

            "Certainly, Dad.  Is there some reason, or were you thinking of us sharing some quality time together?"

            "I'm not exactly sure.  Maybe I just enjoy seeing you oppress people.  Also, we can talk about how fun it is to be such rotten S.O.B.'s!  Ha, ha!"

            "Ha, ha!  Of course, my wicked dad.  I suggest that you and I go on the exploratory mission together.  I have made a scout ship faster than the Warbird and possessing our cloak technology, which is beyond that of those saps in the Milky Way in the Original Universe and which is beyond their detection.  It's also quite loaded with nifty gadgets and nasty weapons.  It'll handle a crew from one to fifteen, and it can generate its own power, so one could theoretically and practically explore on it indefinitely."

            "Great.  How long will you need for your analysis?"

            "No more than a year and a half.  The scanning range can thoroughly scan an entire quadrant in hours, and we have enough speed to circle the galaxy in days. . . at the radius of the farthest star out from the star.  Also, the computer can store all the information.  We have it made."

            "Sounds good."

            "We'll leave after we gloat this afternoon.  MotherBrain, what is absolutely the safest place here?"

            "Kevin and the others don't expect me to be keeping many monster Metroid mutations here," MotherBrain said.  "Too bad for them I have a hundred of those babies!  Hee, hee!"  She pulled a lever, and a door opened.  "Come.  This leads to the most heavily shielded area of the planet."

            "I was just asking.  I don't need to hide stuff now."

            MotherBrain pushed the lever back, and the door closed.  "All right.  Anyway, that region of Metroid is heavily shielded.  Our do-gooding pals would never even suspect that there are many powerful Metroids throughout that maze.  They have this idea that I would have to expend a great deal of energy to control them.  That is false.  They're easy for me to control.  If we put your stuff in there, it would be safe from snoopy visitors."

            "Ah.  Thank you, MB.  Well, I'm going to have lunch.  A certain café in Kakariko Town has good prices, good food, and, today, a good show. . . three boys and three girls getting creamed by twelve nasty creeps."

            "How will you avoid detection?"

            Ludwig withdrew his wand from his shell and swung it; he turned into an average human male in his mid-twenties.  "Do you not find this form a good disguise?"

            "Oh, darn," said Larry.  "If I'd thought of using that form, I'd have netted all the girls easily before."

            "Trust me, I want none of them," Ludwig said.  "I have been attracted to no one before."  This was quite false, but his first romance had ended most tragically, so he did not wish to speak of it.  "If you wish to join me. . ."

            "Of course."  Larry withdrew his own magical Koopa-Sceptre and transformed into a form similar to Ludwig's.  "Ha!  We're still brothers."

            "Except I want no double-date schemes," said Ludwig flatly.  "Let's go."  They went through the nearest warp to Western Hyrule.

            * * *

            Throne Room, Palace of Power, VideoLand.

            Wilykit had finished explaining to Kid Icarus and Steelwill that she wanted them to examine any communication between Metroid and the Galaxy of Léi, the galaxy from which the Borg came, to see if it could contain orders for the Borg.  She requested they use such information to help her find out how Ludwig was controlling the cyborg race.

            Meanwhile, Wilykat and Jayna were talking in the Congregation Hall.  They were the only ones still in there.  "So," Jayna asked, "did you miss me?"

            Making sure he said it in a manner so that Jayna would know he was jesting, Wilykat joked, "Nope.  Not for a minute."

            In the same manner, Jayna said, "And I didn't miss you either, you rascal."  They hugged each other.  "Oh, of course we missed each other."

            "Yeah.  I sure love you, Jayna."

            "I love you, too, Wilykat."  They looked deeply into each other's eyes.  "Should we?"

            "We've definitely waited a long time to do it," Wilykat said.  "I don't think anyone can misinterpret it."

            "You're right."  Without hesitating, they kissed each other.

            A second after they had begun, Zan came in.  "Jayna, I. . . oops!"  He quickly turned to leave.

            However, he was too late.  Upon hearing Zan's voice, Jayna and Wilykat stopped kissing, and Jayna called, "Wait, Zan!  What is it?"

            Zan turned back to his sister.  "You're not mad?"

            "Yes, but I'm saving that for later."

            "Well, it wasn't really important.  I should have just waited."

            "That's no longer an option.  What would you like?"

            "I just wanted to ask you if you'd like to have lunch with me."

            Jayna turned to Wilykat.  "Go ahead, Jayna," said Wilykat.  " 'Kit and I have some things to do on Thundera."

            "All right," Jayna said.  "Where do you want to have lunch, Zan?"

            "I was thinking of that café in Kakariko Town on Hyrule."

            "That's where Johanna, Johannes, Thomas, Kelly, Heinrich, and Liselotte are going," Wilykat commented.  "If you run into them, could you keep an eye on them?  With enemies like ours, we need friends."

            "Sure, Wilykat," said Zan.  "Can we make contact?"

            "Of course, if you want to."  The three went into the throne room.

            "All right.  See you later."

            "See you later, Zan and Jayna."  The Wondertwins went through the door to the new warp hall, the door through which the Silver Hawks had come earlier.

            "Hi, Wilykat," Wilykit said.  "Something happen?"

            "-Sigh.-  Yes.  Have the young ones left?"

            "Yep.  They've left for Hyrule."

            "Zan and Jayna are having lunch there, too."

            "Good.  That means some degree of added safety."

            "That's why I asked the Wondertwins to keep an eye on them."  Wilykit nodded.  "Where's Kevin?"

            "He went to his room.  He told me that his attire must be formal for the ceremony."

            Wilykat gave her a very naughty look.  "And you didn't go with him?" he asked quietly.

            "Wilykat, that remark and that facial expression are worth a pillow-fight," said Wilykit.  "I'm not doing that with him."

            "I was just joking."

            "The implication is no joke."

            "Lighten up.  I don't really want you to do it, sister."

            "You'd better not.  You waited much too long to tell me about this, brother, and I won't let it weaken me now."

            "I'm sorry, 'Kit."

            "It's okay, 'Kat.  Ready to go?"

            "Yeah."

            They went over to Kid Icarus, who was already monitoring communications.  "I know it's a bit soon, but have the sensors detected any communication between Metroid and the Léi Galaxy yet, Kid Icarus?" Wilykit asked.

            "Not yet-icus," Kid Icarus said.  "If there is, I'll call you."

            "Thank you, Kid.  We'll see you later."

            "See you later, Wilykit and Wilykat."  Wilykit and Wilykat left to the warp hall and entered the warp to New Thundera.

            * * *

            Kakariko Town, Light World, Hyrule, VideoLand.

            Heinrich led the other five into town.  He led to the café and to a table, where he motioned for the others to sit down.  "I'll order for you," he said.  "You guys can stay here."

            Everyone but Thomas and Heinrich sat down.  "Might you need a hand, Heinrich?" Thomas asked.

            "Sure, Thomas.  Let's go."  The two went over to the counter.

            The server came to the counter.  "Good afternoon, Prince Heinrich," he said.  "How may I help you today?"

            "Six number threes, please," said Heinrich.  "We'll have Terran caffeine-free Pepsi to drink, with generous ice."

            "Very well, sir."  He went to prepare the order.

            "Dad introduced Kelly and me to Pepsi very early," Thomas said.  "We like it, all right.  What is number three?"

            Heinrich pointed to the menu and indicated the number-specials.  "Right up there."

            "I see.  Quarter-pound cheeseburger with fries."

            "All the worlds in VideoLand have a strong agricultural system, at least.  Even the nobles and royalty must pay money to eat in those places where money changes hands, like here on Hyrule, a policy with which I agree strongly.  The fathers of my mother, of your mother, and of Queen Toadstool were very wise rulers, and their daughters learned well from them.  My mother says that when I am twenty-one, she will appoint me to do most of her job for her.  I can see that part of my job right now is to help your father teach Kelly some about her job."

            "Though he has taught her a great deal already, I'm sure he'd appreciate it," Thomas said.  "Have you had some experience?"

            "A little, yes.  My mother says that one of the hardest things is when what you think is the right thing to do conflicts with what the people want.  I haven't dealt with that, but my logic agrees that the situation is most likely difficult."

            "I can imagine.  I agree with my father when he says that using one's title as an excuse to get away with something is an extremely bad excuse.  The ruler's decision must be made in as logical a manner as possible."

            "Exactly, Thomas.  Power is a responsibility, not a toy.  One of the battles is that all your potential heirs must understand that, not only your first-born son or daughter but all your offspring and all your siblings, as well as your spouse.  I've read about corruption from the most unlikely heirs who happened to inherit the throne of Hyrule.  I also know about my grandfather.  He was a distant cousin to the king who came before him.  That king was very corrupt, but my grandfather was a very good ruler. . . and, illogical as it may seem, he was quite a direct descendant of the Princess Zelda who lived three thousand years ago!"

            "Very strange," Thomas said.

            "Well, the bad part of it is that until a hundred years before my mother was born, even if a female was the most logical heir, she was passed over if any male heir was available.  Fortunately, that chauvenist view has been eradicated."

            The server came with three trays on a cart.  "Here you go, sir," he said.  "Just bring the cart back when you've finished unloading the trays, please."

            "Certainly," said Heinrich.  "How much?"

            "Six pounds even."  Heinrich gave him seven and a half pounds.

            "Keep the change, sir."

            "Thank you, Your Highness."

            Heinrich rolled the cart over to the table.  "Here we go."  He and Thomas each took a tray and carefully placed it on the table.  Thomas took the remaining tray, and Heinrich took the cart back over to the counter.  Each tray had two plates, two drinks, and two sets of silverware with cloth napkins.  On one side, Johanna sat at the end of the table.  Kelly sat to her right, and Liselotte to Kelly's right.  Johannes sat across from Johanna.  Thomas sat down to the left of Johannes, and Heinrich to Thomas's left.  Heinrich and Liselotte removed the food, drinks, napkins, and utensils from their tray and put it at their places, and the other four followed suit.

            "Johannes," Heinrich said, "that object to your right is a tray receptacle.  If you will, please place our three trays in it."  He passed his tray to Thomas, who put his on top of it.  Thomas then passed the two trays to Johannes, who put his tray on top of those two and put the three on the receptacle that Heinrich had mentioned.  "Thank you, Johannes.  You may have eaten this type of food before, Thomas and Kelly, but this is not replicated.  It's natural."  He indicated the red and yellow bottles in the middle of the table.  "You probably know that red is ketchup and yellow is mustard, and I'm sure you have a good idea how much is too much."

            "We sure do," said Kelly.  "This looks good, already."

            "We don't know much about this," Johanna said.

            "All right, then.  Here's burger preparation basics, a visual lesson."  She removed the top part of the bun from the burger.  Then, she took the glass ketchup bottle and poured a light swirl of ketchup on top.  Afterwards, she took the mustard bottle and put a small amount of mustard on top.  "There we go.  And I find that it tastes better with some tomato and lettuce."  She took the tomato slice from her plate. . .  "Tomato."  . . .and put it on.  Then, she took a piece of the lettuce. . .  "Lettuce."  . . .and put it on top of that.  "These are actually cheeseburgers because of the cheese.  Do these things actually weigh a fourth of an American pound?"

            "Yes, and that's after cooking," Heinrich said.  "They make sure to have enough beef there so it weighs a quarter pound after the burger has been cooked."

            "I see.  It looked a bit large to be only a fourth of a pound."  She poured a small pond of ketchup onto an unoccupied part of the plate.  "I prefer to dip my fries in the ketchup.  If you pour the ketchup directly onto them, it makes them soggy over time.  Johanna?"

            "Let's see," said Johanna.  She applied the condiments perfectly, then passed them to her brother.  After he had finished, he passed them to Thomas.  When finished, he passed them to Liselotte, who, when finished, passed them to Heinrich.  Once Heinrich had finished applying condiments to his burger and fries, they all began to eat.

            Soon after the six had begun to eat, Zan and Jayna, each carrying a tray, came by.  "Well, good afternoon, all," Jayna said.

            "Good afternoon, Zan and Jayna," said Heinrich.  "If you'd like to join us, we have enough room here."  The others expressed their approval.

            Zan said, "Thank you."  He and Jayna emptied the contents of their trays onto the table.  He then took both trays and put them into the receptacle.  After this, he and his sister both sat down.

            Jayna asked, "Could you pass me the ketchup and mustard, please?"

            "Certainly," said Liselotte, handing her the ketchup, then the mustard.

            At another table, Ludwig and Larry were already eating.  Their table was at a place where they could easily see the good guys.  Larry turned his head to the left and saw Zan and Jayna at the table.  "Ludwig, you won't like this."

            "What?" asked Ludwig, turning to his right.  "Oh, drat!  It's those Wondertwits!  Why in heck did they have to have lunch here?"

            "Great food, good service, rock-bottom prices," Larry said.

            "Well, that is a good reason, as well as the popularity of food from Captain N's society."

            "Zan and Jayna did live in a similar society for some time."

            "Yes, and they've also visited here quite a bit."  The two continued eating.  "Are our friends here yet?"

            "I don't. . . heh, heh!  Liquie is sliding over to the eight goody-goods."

            Ludwig turned and saw Liquidator in puddle form.  "Ah, good."

            Outside the café, the other eleven villains were waiting for Liquidator's report.  His voice came over Ganon's communicator.  "They have friends with them," Liquidator said.  "The Wondertwins are with them."

            "Hm," said Ganon.  "They could be bothersome."

            "We can still handle 'em."

            "I agree.  We'll let them finish before we attack.  For now, we'll go in for a drink.  Come back out here, please, Liquidator."

            Liquidator came back out.  "How shall we disguise ourselves?"

            "I shall take care of that," said Mumm-ra.  He snapped his fingers, and all of them were granted good human disguises, except Amok, who was turned into a dog.

            "Well, this is a new one!" remarked Luna.

            Dr. Wily and Nuclesís had the forms of their younger selves.  "Oh, good!" Wily said.

            "Now," Ganon said, "shall we sit at the bar and have some soda?"  The twelve entered the bar in three trios.  First came Mega Volt, Liquidator, and Bushroot; then, Dr. Wily, Ridley, and Nuclesís entered; afterwards, Ganon, Hardware, and Windhammer - whose Tuning Fork had been turned into a small stainless steel dessert fork, which was now in his right pocket - came in; and finally, Mumm-ra, Aluro, and Luna, walking Amok, entered.  Each trio entered at irregular intervals to avert suspicion.  They found the price very reasonable. . . only twenty-five pence a soda!  To further please them, all refills were complimentary.

            Soon, the eight good guys had finished.  When they saw the twelve disguised villains at the bar, Johanna and Johannes grew immediately suspicious.  "I have a bad feeling about those guys," Johanna said quietly.

            "So do I," Johannes said.

            "Well, Father's always taught us not to underestimate people based on appearance," said Thomas.

            Zan and Jayna looked.  "Oh, great," Zan said quietly.  "I have seen pictures of Dr. Wily in his youth.  That guy looks exactly like him."

            "I wonder," said Heinrich.  He took his tricorder and discreetly examined the twelve people and the dog at the bar.  He quietly asked, "Tricorder, can you detect whether these thirteen are in disguise?"

            "Unknown," said the tricorder at low volume.  "Uplinking with the N-Team computer."  After a few seconds, the tricorder said, "There is a 95% chance that the thirteen beings whom you have scanned are in disguise by way of genetic shadow."

            "Can you extrapolate DNA and give their probable real forms?"

            "In progress."  Soon, one of the people popped on the screen, next to a picture.  "Use the arrow keys to scroll through the page," said the tricorder.

            "One appears to be Hardware."  He pressed the down arrow key.  "Another is Windhammer."  He kept pressing down.  "One's Mumm-ra.  Another's Luna.  The dog is Amok.  Another is Aluro.  The one whom Zan mentioned is, indeed, Wily.  Another is Ridley.  One is Charles Nuclesís, whose disguise is also in a younger form.  Another is Liquidator.  One is Mega Volt.  The others are Bushroot and Ganon!  What the heck are they doing here?"

            "How long in advance did you plan on having lunch here?" Jayna asked.

            "We planned it last evening," said Thomas.

            "Ganon could have found out about that," Liselotte said.  "He was at the castle, and he might have left a bug behind."

            "A bug?" asked Johanna.

            "A listening device," Kelly said.  "Dandy.  What do we do now?"

            "We lure them away," said Heinrich.  "I don't want the people here to get hurt.  If they're really here to get us, they'll come after us.  Just pass me your empty plates with the silverware."  The other seven each handed him their plates and silverware, which he stacked upon his.  He put all the silverware on the top plate.  "Johannes, could you put these guys on the top tray?"

            "Sure," said Johannes.  Heinrich passed him the plates, which he put on the top tray.  "What are we going to do?"

            "By leaving now," Liselotte said, "we will either avoid a fight altogether or, at least, avoid having to fight in town.  It's best for the populace to do that outside of town.  Of course, if these creeps turn around and start terrorising the populace, we come straight back."

            "Correct," said Heinrich.  "I think we'd best go.  Customers don't have to take the trays and dirty dishes up to the counter.  I usually do it, but this situation's different.  Oh, the tip."  He laid fifty pence - two twenty-pence pieces and one ten-pence piece - on the table.  "Let's go."  They got up and left town by going south on the main road.

            Larry saw this.  "They're going."

            Ludwig saw their comrades at the bar.  The evil Koopa brothers could see through their allies' disguises.  "And Mega Volt has noticed."

            Mega Volt turned to the good guys' table.  "They're leaving," he told Ganon, next to him.

            "Oh, are they?" Ganon asked.  "Good, Mega Volt.  Let's go, guys."  The twelve got up.

            "Excuse me," the bartender said.  "You haven't paid yet, good gentlemen and good lady."

            "You want payment?" asked Hardware, reaching into his backpack (which had also been disguised).  "Then take. . ."

            "Ha, ha!" Liquidator laughed, slapping his hand over Hardware's mouth.  "You must forgive my friend's rudeness!  He is in a very bad mood today.  I'll gladly pay."  He slapped twenty pounds on the bar.  "Thank you, sir, and keep the change."

            "Well. . . thanks, sir," said the bartender, taking the note.

            Ganon whispered, "Nice save, Liquie."  The twelve left the café.

            Ludwig and Larry had finished their lunch and put up their trays, plates, and utensils as the good kids had.  Ludwig laid a hearty tip on the table.  "C'mon, Larry," said Ludwig.  "Let's watch this."

            "Yo," Larry replied.  They got up and followed their allies.

            * * *

            Heinrich and Liselotte stopped in a spot in the woods south of town.  "This is as good a place as any," said Heinrich, drawing his sword, which had been passed down through Link's family for generations.  His sister drew her bow and readied her lance.  "Thomas, Kelly, Johanna, and Johannes, I suggest you let Zan, Jayna, Liselotte, and me do the fighting."

            "Yes.  Unless you're overwhelmed," Thomas replied.

            "-Sigh.-  My father's told me about your father.  If you're like what my father says your father's like, you'll jump in before the second shot is fired."

            "I'm going to resist that temptation unless you start losing."

            "Just don't get hurt, Thomas."

            Ganon and his group came along, still disguised.  "Well, greetings, all!" he said cheerfully.  "Four rulers, four siblings!  May we pass?"

            "Don't try your lame party-tricks, Dragmire," said Heinrich tauntingly.

            "Ooh, I hate that name!" screamed Ganon.  "I am no longer Ganondorf Dragmire but simply Ganon!"  He snapped his fingers, and all twelve of the villains popped back to normal.  "For that petty insult, I shall make sure you never live to inherit Hyrule!"

            "I sincerely doubt it.  By then, my father and I shall have destroyed you."

            "Blasted brat!"  Heinrich shot him with a beam from his sword!  "Oof!  Aah!"  He popped away.

            "What the heck?" Luna demanded.

            "He was unprepared," said Heinrich.  "I sent him home to regenerate with one mere blast.  Any of you care to fight me?"

            "I would!" Mumm-ra said.  He took the Sword of Plundarr, the double-bladed sword of evil that had caused Old Thundera's destruction twelve and a half hundred years ago.  "Care to match wits with Mumm-ra, the Ever-Living, Hyrulian prince?"  He slashed at Heinrich, who dodged.  The two swordfought.  Mumm-ra had enormous strength, but Heinrich fought with years of skill and marvellous youthful agility that kept him ahead of Mumm-ra.

            Hardware quickly assembled a weapon.  "Ha!  Let's see you do-gooders stop me now!" he laughed.  He was instantly tied up by a net-arrow.  "Wha. . . hey!"  What was more, he dropped his device before he could activate it.  "Drat!"

            "Gotcha!" laughed Liselotte.

            "I predict inclement weather conditions," Windhammer said.  He banged his Tuning Fork and produced a rainstorm.  "Drat!  I wanted hail."

            "You want hail?" Liquidator asked.  He jumped up into the cloud, and it instantly began hailing. . . mostly on Liselotte!

            "Hey!  Ow!" exclaimed Liselotte.  "Yak!  Help!!"

            "It's Zan to the rescue!" Zan shouted.  He and his sister prepared their fists.

            "Wondertwin powers," they both commanded, "activate!"  Upon finishing, they touched their fists together and began glowing with transformation energy.

            "Form of a whirlwind!" exclaimed Zan.  He turned into a dark funnel that blasted the hail at Windhammer and Hardware!

            "Oh, no!  Ouch!" Windhammer exclaimed.  "Ow!  Hardware, let's warp out of here!"

            "Yaah!  I'm with you, Windy!"  He pressed a button on his belt, and he and Windhammer were transported away.

            "So, you're full of hot air, eh?" Liquidator asked.  "Here's water in your eyes!"  He jumped back in the cloud, and it soaked Zan with flood-water.

            "Yuck!" Zan exclaimed.  Sputtering, he turned back to normal.

            "Ha, ha!  The Liquidator brand delivers every time."

            "And now that he's soaked," said Mega Volt, "I can fry him!"  He blasted Zan with an electric blast.

            "Yah!" Zan screamed.  He fell to the ground.

            "Zan!" cried Jayna.

            "Drat you!" Johanna said.  She tossed a pudding capsule into Liquidator.

            "Oh, yuck!" shouted Liquidator.  "More pudding!"

            "Kids," Thomas said, "do not try this at home!"  He drew his Zapper and blasted Mega Volt into Liquidator.  Mega Volt short-circuited, and Liquidator blasted pudding everywhere.

            "Yah!" cried Bushroot.  "I'm outta here!"  He made a warp with a tomato and jumped in.

            "Hey, you puny petunia!" shouted Mega Volt.  "Wait for me!"  He jumped in.

            "Why, you cowards!" Liquidator shouted as he shed his pudding.  He turned angrily to the young Wilytwins.  "That wasn't very pleasant, Thunder Kits.  I assume you learned that annoying trick from your mother and uncle!"

            "It's always nice to encounter a villain with good taste," noted Johannes.  He fingered some pudding off his hand and tasted.  "Yummy."

            "I shall knock you blockheads into oblivion!"

            "Blockheads?" asked Johanna tauntingly.  "How about cement-head?"

            "Just try it, brats!"  Liquidator merely stood there.

            "We warned you," Johannes said.  He and Johanna tossed cement capsules at him.  However, they burst open when they contacted his body, and the cement slid off him.

            "Uh, oh," said Johanna.

            "I predict another freeze," Zan said.

            "Oh, no you don't," said Aluro.  He shone his Mesmerisation Beam on the Wondertwins.  "Do not transform.  There is no need for further senseless conflict," he said in his hypnotic voice.

            "There is no need for further senseless conflict," the Wondertwins echoed.  They had been completely unprepared.

            "You missed me, Aluro," said Thomas.  His Zapper set for stun, he shot the Luna-tack in the chest and knocked him out.

            "What. . . Aluro," said Zan.  "Thanks, Thomas."

            "Well, just ducky," Liquidator said.  "Prepare for liquidation, Private N!"  He soared towards Thomas and Kelly in a tidal wave.  Fortunately, Thomas was prepared.  He grabbed his sister about the chest under the arms and hit the A button on his Power Pad and jumped high.  "What?  No!"  Helpless to the laws of physics, Liquidator broke against the trees.

            A moment later, Thomas and Kelly returned to land.  "What did Heinrich tell you?" Liselotte asked wryly.

            "I know, Liselotte," sighed Thomas.

            "You may have defeated my stooge and that blob of water," Luna screamed in her irritating claws-on-chalkboard soprano voice, "but you won't get me, brat!  Charge, Amok!"  The large white beast who was her steed charged Thomas.

            "Scatter!" Thomas commanded the others.  With little choice, those around him obeyed.  He stood his ground.  When Amok was nearly upon him, however, he very quickly got on his back, temporarily increased his strength by pressing the B button on his Power Pad, and shoved Amok upwards.  He quickly rolled aside, jumped up, and got out of the way.

            Five seconds later, Amok crashed on his chest.  Luna fell off onto her head.  Amok was unconscious, but his rider most certainly was not.  "Yaah!" she screamed.  "No human alive can lift Amok's weight!"

            "The Power Pad cannot only cause me to jump or move side-to-side," Thomas said.  "I can also triple my own strength for a few seconds with a tap of one button."

            Johanna hugged him.  "Thomas!  You're so smart!"

            "Why, you human brat!" screamed Luna.  "I shall destroy you, you troublesome boy!"

            "Uh, oh," Thomas said.  "Don't make me mad, Luna."  He aimed his Zapper at her.  "Get back to Metroid with you two pals, Amok and Aluro.  Now."

            "A disgraceful retreat!" Luna yelled.  "You haven't seen the last of Luna, the Terrible, First Mate N!"  She hit a badge that transported her, Amok, and Aluro away.

            "What?" demanded Mumm-ra.  This was his undoing.  The brief moment he paused, Heinrich took advantage and, with a powerful stroke, tossed the Sword of Plundarr from Mumm-ra's grasp.  "No!"

            "Yes!" Heinrich retorted.  "Like my sword?  It's nice and reflective!"

            "No!" screamed the mummy.  He shielded his eyes.  "You can't do it!"

            "Oh, suit yourself," Johannes said.  He tossed a warp capsule on Mumm-ra and transported the mummy to Metroid.

            "No. . .!" Mumm-ra exclaimed.

            "I knew you guys wouldn't follow my instructions," said Heinrich, feigning outrage.  "Thanks, guys."

            "You kids won't defeat us," Wily said.  "You have surely been informed that we are MotherBrain's most powerful agents!"

            "Yes," said Ridley.

            "If you give up now, MotherBrain may spare your lives," Nuclesís said.

            "Come on," said Heinrich.  "You seem to think that you can capture us."

            Groggily, Liquidator formed near the thee other remaining villains.  "The Liquidator brand is durable," he said angrily.  "It will do its job mile after mile, lump after lump!  That's why I was selected as Ludwig's first officer."

            "There are four of us and eight of you," Ridley said.  "Since you are the offspring of my leader and friend's most hated enemy, Thomas and Kelly, I take you.  Heinrich and Liselotte, Dr. Wily will crush you with powerful technology.  Wilytwins, Nuclesís will make your every atom suffer.  Wondertwins, Liquidator shall bash you with powerful watery tactics. . . for he's all wet, but he's no drip!  Think you can take us by your twinsomes?"

            "We'll crush your little party, Ridley," Heinrich stated.

            "We'll see.  Attack!"